Dating is stressful and confusing enough, but when you're dealing with a guy/girl who is sending mixed signals or playing games you can literally find yourself going insane. We all do it, and if you're thinking you don't, well newsflash, you do. When he/she isn't being consistent in the way they text or interact with you, you start second guessing just about everything, stalking their social media, researching their past relationships, and ( the worst ) texting them like 27 times in a row. Unless you're like me and have ADHD and sending that many texts in a row is normal. My biggest pet peeve used to be a guy not texting me back and over the years I have come up with a few tips and tricks to not let my crazy show tooooo soon in a relationship/situtionship.
1) Play a game on your phone. It sounds stupid, but trust me it works! It allows you to still be on your phone, but off of social media and other messaging apps ( which I encourage in a time like this ), and it makes time go by. It also creates something else for you guys to talk about and who knows, maybe there is a two player option and you'll find out you have something in common!
2) Post a snap story. Of course this only works if whoever you're talking to has Instagram or Snapchat. This trick can create peace of mind because if they check your story and still ignore you, you can basically tell yourself "okay, they're not that into me" and move on to his hotter friend and other brother.
3. Text another guy! Obviously if you are in a relationship, do not do this! But if you're just talking, then what the heck! Don't cut out your other four "boyfriends" just because number five has a beard.
4. Tinder it up! And I'm not saying this just so you can get some. The best part about this one is you never even need to talk to anyone! Literally just download the app and swipe right! When you get that match you'll get a boost of self esteem and remember that yes, there is a lot of trash in the sea, but there is also a lot of other fish! My favorite part is deleting the app after a few dozen guys have messaged me!
5. Turn your anxiety into something productive! Head to the gym! Exercise is known for making you feel good and help calm you down! Blast a good playlist on your phone and mute those notifications! Plus, you can drop a hot selfie on Insta! Other productive things to do: Study, catch up on work, masturbate, go for a walk, clean your closet, don't stalk his ex, or go back to an old hobby that doesn't include stalking his ex.
6. Makeover! And I'm talking from scratch! Like, this starts with a shower! Turn up some good tunes and have a good cry in the shower if you need to, but once you step out of the tub, the tears are over and it is YOU time! There are a few ways to do this one! You can either go to a store like Sephora or a local salon and let yourself get pampered for a price, or if you're poor like me you can DIY! The trick is to have fun and not do your everyday look! Try a smokey eye! Throw on some glitter! Attempt some awesome braids like the ones @Kelsrfloyd does on Instagram! This whole process takes up time, distracts you, and is definitely fun!
7. Make a list of how cool you are! Is this too much in the feels for you? Sorry, but it works! Soon you'll realize that you don't need the attention of another person to make you feel complete! Your list can include anything from "I have pretty eyes" to "I'm great at sucking dick" and "I was nice to that asshole at Starbucks yesterday".
8. Tell your BFF! He or she has probably been in the anxious and crazy state of mind you are currently in and they deff want the best for you! Talk about it! Suggest meeting for a drink to complain! It's therapeutic!
9. Rationalize. It's soo much easier to just crack like Gretchen Weiners and show up at his front door, but sometimes he really is busy! Take it from me. I'm ALWAYS on my phone, but currently have over 50 unopened texts. Think of other possibilities; bad service, some people have jobs where they cannot be on their phones, he has a wife, maybe they have a long commute. Bottom line, you are not the problem. Life happens!
10. Be upfront about who you are. Depending on how serious things are and how well you know the person, sometimes you just need to be real. Personally, I have told guys straight up about how I was treated in my past relationship and why that makes me so anxious when I start something new. If they're a nice person they'll understand. If they're turned off by your honesty, then they don't deserve you! Fuck his dad, become his stepmom and ground his rude ass.